How To Write A Eulogy Or Funeral Speech




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The Suicide Eulogy

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The Suicide Eulogy

Suicide is not painless, especially for those left behind.

If a friend or family member has chosen to end his/her life this, to me, means the hardest eulogy of all. Clouding the normal emotions of love and loss can be anger, guilt, confusion and even hatred.

What a 'nasty bastard thing to do' is often the reaction and undoubtedly there will be repercussions far greater/deeper than the person committing the act would have imagined... because lack of consequence is something that comes with that terrible 'black dog' called depression.

The easiest thing with a suicide funeral is to gloss over the means of death and the emotions felt by those left behind - just have a few readings, poems and music and move on. But, for me, this isn't enough. It does both the deceased and those attending the funeral a disservice.

I have had people close to me end their lives (and attempt to) and it is something that never leaves you but a funeral service is not a place for anger or hostility, nor is it fitting to throw a blanket over the good memories and achievements of the deceased. And, if there are children of the deceased left behind, it is important that they gain some support and love from the eulogy.

All situations will be different but perhaps a way to start the eulogy would be to thank all those who have given their support to the family members grieving - for the phone calls, flowers, casseroles, visits, thoughts and prayers. The fact that none of us knows just how many people out there do care can also be a subtle pointer to others that suicide is not only painful but pointless.

With subtlety and sensitivity it is possible to be honest and even confrontational before moving to the good things to remember about the deceased and to give a fitting farewell.

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